Don’t Worry Jesus, I’ve Got This

I’ve been trying to deal with the question lately of, “If I find something in scripture that is different than what I’m currently doing, what should I do?”

Now I know on the surface, it sounds simple, change what I’m doing, right? But I’ve inserted something else, or am assuming something different than the question implies. I ask it in my head more like, “If I find something in scripture that doesn’t fit my idea of what a direct command is, do I have to do it?”

I know that question has a lot of errors in it, but I let it hang around. I think it lets me have some sense of control.

But is that what it means;

with Christ I have been crucified, and live no more do I, and Christ doth live in me; -Galatians 2:20a (YNG)

Is that the life Christ is living in me if I question everything in light of my view of direct commands? Can I honestly say;

I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. -Galatians 2:20b (NLT)

Is my life being shaped by the life of Jesus, or is Jesus being shaped by my life? Looking at my life, I don’t Live my life by trusting Jesus, the Son of God. But why not, He loved me and even gave himself for me!

Who else is there to trust than someone who gave everything just for me. (I know for the whole world too, but this is personal. Is there anything greater in this life to take personal?) I need to stop this self-trust, I-can-figure-it-out, living-for-me, let-me-handle-it-Jesus, lie that has been my life.

I picture Jesus and I up on a stagecoach, fighting over the reins, well, I’m fighting at least. I also see my sick joke of taunting Jesus, pretending to hand the reins over, but at the last second pulling them back to the false security of my own arms. But it’s not a joke. It’s my warped view of Jesus.

If you don’t trust Him, you don’t know Him.
If you can’t trust Him, you want something else.
If you won’t trust Him, you don’t know yourself.

I’ve got a little (i.e. a lot) of all three.

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